The Wolf Dream

The Wolf Dream. I'm having the Wolf Dream. It's always the Wolf Dream these days. It started with one wolf and then two wolves and now there are a pack of them. There are twelve of them surrounding me, biting into me, tearing away chunks of my flesh. I turn and run from them and I always run so fast and so far, but it is never enough. They always catch me. They always devour me.

This time it is different. This time, I'm running through the forest, but I turn and the forest is gone. I'm running through my high school now and all my old teachers are watching me run for my life. "That'll never do," my algebra teacher says. "Bad form," my gym teacher says. "C minus," my English teacher says. Their lips don't move and they stand stock still, like statues. I run past them and out the door.

And now I'm back in the forest, where I know the wolves will catch me. I turn right and I'm in my house now and my parents are berating me for leaving the door open. "If you leave the door open, all kinds of animals can get it," my mom says, shaking her finger. I stop and try to talk to her, but a wolf pounces on her and rips out her throat. "Now see what you've done," my father says before another wolf rips out his throat.

The wolves turn from their meal and look at me with amber eyes. I back away, but then I hear growling behind me, too. I am surrounded. I only have one means of escape: the staircase. I run up the stairs, nearly tripping, but reaching the top just in time. I open the door to the left and go inside.

But I don't find myself in my room, where I should be. No, I'm inside the circus now. There are the fire-eaters and sword swallowers and contortionists. And there's the ringleader, with his clean white gloves. He gestures to me and I walk forward. "Don't worry, my boy," he says. "They aren't real. Nothing is real, you see. It is all a Dream, a grotesque and foolish dream." He gestures to the entire circus as it disappears into darkness, only a small circle of light illuminating him and me. "Nothing exists but you."

A hear the growling again and realize the wolves are all around me, just outside the circle of light. I beg and plead for the ringleader to help me, but he only smiles and repeats, "Nothing exists but you." Then he backs away into the darkness and disappears.

The growling gets louder and louder and I see their amber eyes and sharp, white teeth. They are going to eat me now and I won't wake up, I'll die here, in the Wolf Dream, I'll die for real. But as they come closer, I close my eyes and wake up.

And then I was back in my bed, so relieved that the dream wasn't real. I was sweating, so I decided to take a shower. After I finished the shower, I wiped away the condensation on the mirror and looked at myself. Then I opened my mouth wide and saw the teeth of the wolf.

And I woke up again. That has never happened to me. A dream within a dream. Weird Inception-style dreaming. I mean, I just had to write that whole thing up here before I forgot it.

Strange, usually my mom and dad are awake before me. I don't hear them though.

I walked downstairs and knocked on their bedroom, but they didn't answer. I opened the door slowly and saw them. Their throats were slashed repeatedly. Blood was everywhere. I felt sick and almost threw up. But then I got it. I know what's going on.

I'm still dreaming, aren't I? Of course I am.

And now that I know I'm dreaming, I can wake up from it. Pinching won't work, I know that. I wonder if killing yourself in a dream means you actually wake up?

Let's find out.